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every grain of rice counts
all it costs you is time.
My donation to date to
The United Nations
World Food Program:
71,680 grains of rice
updated 6-24-08

A bit of narcissism

Friday's Child/51-55. Lives in United States/Louisiana/New Orleans/The Westbank, speaks English. Spends 20% of daytime online. Uses a Faster (1M+) connection.  I play hard, love fiercely & unconditionally. I'm steadfastly loyal, even when others are not./Recovering addict since 09/90.
This is my blogchalk:
United States, Louisiana, New Orleans, The Westbank, English, Friday's Child, 51-55, I play hard, love fiercely & unconditionally. I'm steadfastly loyal, even when others are not., Recovering addict in NA since 09/90. Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis 12/04

Blogging Without Obligation

Friday's Child


As in ... "You SO own me!"

Sinja OWNED!
Co owned by Deirdre

Warning! Mood swings!

"I have seen the sea when it is stormy and wild; when it is quiet and serene; when it is dark and moody. And in all its moods I see myself." --Martin Buxbaum

yucky. -- Otto's Mood Faces
Feeling emotional.

Day of the Week Poem

What child are you? Click to calculate your day of birth
We lost it all to
Hurricane Katrina

I'm a Katrina Survivor!

1 Dead in Attic by Chris Rose = To experience the aftermath of Katrina, this is the book to read
1 Dead in Attic
Chris Rose

Washing Away - New Orleans hurricane vulnerabilities
2002 acclaimed series
on New Orleans'
hurricane vulnerabilities

Rebuild New Orleans!

This is our love, Louisiana

Katrina Information Network
Katrina 2 Years Later - CNN Report

Hurricanes I've Survived

Matter of Grey Matter

September 11, 2001 --
Through blurred double vision, I watched in horror as the Twin Towers in NYC crumbled to the ground. I feared I was going blind and prayed, "Please don't let these horrifying images be the last I see."

An MRI revealed a brain lesion pressing against my optic nerve. Several years of invasive tests and terrifying uncertainty followed. Finally, in December of 2004 I received my diagnosis ...

Multiple Sclerosis

"What is MS?" Video

I began daily injections of Copaxone in June of 2005.  Although I seem to have permanent symptoms from my last exacerbation, my last MRI revealed no new lesions and no new scarring.

I recently discovered that the best prep for injection is a warm compress before and after. I no longer get unsightly bruises or huge knots and there's less pain.

National MS Society

Mission: end the
devastating effects of MS

Join the Movement *video*

My Champions are:
CandyPen and
Glenda, my sweet
I'm honored & humbled

Band Against MS

Multiple Sclerosis and
the Aspartame Hoax


resigned 4/16/08

Ear Candy

Music hath charms
to soothe a savage beast,
To soften rocks,
or bend a knotted oak.
-- William Congreve --

.:: 60s and 70s music ::.

Listen: Windows Media Player
Listen:  Real Media Player
Listen:  Pop-Up Flash Player

or my playlist @
Project Playlist

div line

.:: Diablo Tristram Village ::.
Matt Uelmen

Get Music Tracks
Create Playlist @

Little known tidbit about Friday: I paid $600 for my very first computer in 1996. It was built to spec for one reason ... so I could play Diablo. I became addicted to the music of Tristram Village. To me, it's musical valium.

I am loved!


A thoughtful token
that changes often
from my sweet friend,
Candy @ Daily Thoughts

previous tokens

From precious Smallstar ...

Smallstar's Happy Heart - click to see full image

From my dollface, Melly Girl
pretty sparkly from Melly Girl

And I love!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

  Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting



  Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting



  Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting



Gratis Graphics

If you requested a graphic and it's not here then it's probably here.

Deirdre <3 Sinja

If time and health allow, I'm willing to make custom group hugs. Request on taggie. Specify colors & names. Group hug without names is fine ... whatever. Two to four huggers.

Hugs by Gratis Graphics
Recent Mouse Doodles


coming soon -- my newphew, Gavin!

Compassion in action

[x] Don't almost give. GIVE!

For my mother, my sister, Meecie & May
[x] American Diabetes Association

For my daddy
[x] American Liver Foundation

For Frank, Meecie & Me
[x] Nat'l Institute of Mental Health

For my sister and me
Sometimes losing
is really winning!

My Presurgical Weight: 225 lbs
Total Weight Loss: 128 lbs
Current Weight: 108-112 lbs
[x]American Obesity Association

For Cassie, her mother, her stepfather, her father and my jackass brother
My clean date: Sept 1990
[x] Narcotics Anonymous

For James:
[x] Autism Speaks


Gifts, believe me, captivate both men and Gods, Jupiter himself was won over and appeased by gifts. -Ovid-

.: More Book Resources :.

New & used books
Find the lowest price at more
than a hundred bookstores,
60,000 sellers, in a click.

Joined || Cliques

Woodstock '69 - three days of love and peace What a cutie patootie!
the ageless project
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100% Certifiably blogdriven & insane! Insane!

<<---  ? Bloggin' Fools # --->


.:Recently Joined:.

Massages - YUM!

[ Sine qua non ]

[x] Love Letters
[x] hugs
[x] Imbibe
[x] Blogdrive
[x] Scentsational
[x] Starbucks
[x] Vieux Carre

[ captivation ]

[x] She Inspires Us
[x] Friday's Child
[x] Mistress Anne
[x] The Wild At Heart
[x] Tempus Fugit
[x] HOUSE rules
[x] The truth is out there
[x] JANE
[x] Moonlight

[ titillation ]

Hoops & Yoyo
Hoops & Yoyo

[x] cute but psycho
[x] Neurotically Yours

[ music ]

[x] Make Love, Not War

[ drool ]

[x] Sugary Cuteness

Contact Me

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.:: Thursday, July 23, 2009 ::.

Out of the frying pan into the fire ...

It's hard to know what to say ... even embarrassing.  There have been so many changes.  Unfortunate drama. 

I was terribly unstable emotionally which took it's toll on everyone around me.  The tension escalated until it erupted into drama and I was forced by circumstances to flee the haven I fled to for safety.  How ironic is that?  I lost the only valuable possession that survived Katrina -- ruined beyond repair -- once a valuable antique, now worthless.  I don't know how it happened.  I suspect it was the unfortunate victim of the fallout.  I can't see any other way it could have gotten so damaged.  All I can say is oh well -- it's just a thing.  Not anything I want to grieve over -- bigger fish to fry -- bigger concerns to care about.

The biggest loss ... I lost a friend.  The who, how, what and why isn't unimportant.  It's over.  People will say it will be OK but I'm fairly certain that's not the case.  Truthfully, I don't think it would be in either of our best interest to pursue reconciliation.  I'm not sure it ever will be.  Time will tell but that's not my biggest concern right now.

Where am I?  Limbo.

Oddly, the person who came to my rescue was Mr. Man.  I'm living out of a suitcase in the spare bedroom of his condo.  He's been supportive, loving, caring ... sober.  I cried for days.  Uncharacteristically he comforted me and apologized for his part in the situation. 

During the moving I did something that aggravated my siatic nerve.  I've been in  horrible pain.  Mr. Man has been taking care of me -- something he never did the entire eleven years we were together.  He tells me he didn't think I'd leave.  He talks about how empty his life was without me.  He says he still wants to try.  I tell him I still don't trust him.  I tell him I won't be pressured and the fact that I have nowhere to go at present doesn't mean we'll reconcile.  I tell him I'm most interested in getting me better physically and emotionally.  In fact, it's my ONLY concern.  It's time for to take care of me.  I won't allow anyone to deter me.  I WILL get better ... with help.

This last event has me feeling vulnerable, defective, degraded and humiliated but not defeated.  Although, I am concerned that I'm so broken not even my best friend was able to stand me.  Speaks volumes, I think.

Honestly, I haven't decided anything other than I want to continue therapy.   I'm safe for now but in my heart and mind I'm lost and have no idea where I'm going.  BUT ... as my mother always told me, "In everything a blessing" -- I just can't see the blessing in this yet but one day my mouth will fly wide open, I"ll gasp and then say, "Oh, now I see!"

California is still a dream.  I'll never lose hope ... ever!

By the way, y'all are responsible for lifting up my heart and the corners of my mouth.  The joy of living ... y'all are very much a part of that joy for me.   Thank you!

And in the end, the love you take
is equal to the love you make
Chronicled :: 2:56 pm :: Friday's Child

Diane J Standiford
August 27, 2009   09:36 AM PDT
I hope things r looking up now. Calif is a fair goal, you can do it. You r a very strong person. Your friends far and near are behind you.
July 24, 2009   04:10 PM PDT
Erm,.. yeah ,.. what they said,.. and erm,.. DIET COKE AND POPCORN!!!,.. good Gawd girl don't ya know what that does to your stomach???? Well,.. OK neither do I,... but It can't be good.
July 23, 2009   10:47 PM PDT
it appears all has been said that I'd want to say, too ... so, I'll just give ya a {{hugg}} and say I love you and I'll see ya on the farm~!
July 23, 2009   07:08 PM PDT
Can I call you soon?
July 23, 2009   06:58 PM PDT
hold tight to that dream of happiness. it will come true. :hugs: i'm sorry about everything that went down to lead up to this, and losing a friendship can almost be as devastating to a woman as losing a relationship. i love you......
July 23, 2009   06:43 PM PDT
You just do what you need for you right now. That's the most important thing now.

I think of you more often than you know. Take care of yourself. You are quite important!!

July 23, 2009   06:20 PM PDT
*hugs tight*
July 23, 2009   04:24 PM PDT
It is not surprising that Mr. Man would be there during these times. The years you have had together mean something. I guess, I am babbling.. but it all makes sense to me. At any rate.. you hang in there any way you can, you do what you can .. and I believe in the end.. good things will come! Did I say anything that made a lick of sense?

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